Happy Birthday Mr F

Tuesday this week saw Mr Flash's birthday. 

Birthdays have always been a day that I try to make really special, even in just a small way. I try to plan lovely little activities, make sure there are lots of little presents to open in the morning, and that we can go to bed at the end of the day thinking 'that was really special'.

However this year, and I don't know if it is to do with everything that is going on, but it seems to have creeped up on me a bit and I wasn't in the least bit organised. So much so, I didn't even go present (or cake ingredient) shopping until Monday! 

Monday was a mad busy day. Buying presents, wrapping presents (whilst our darling little munchkin tried to unwrap them) and making cake. It didn't have the best of starts (it wouldn't bloody rise!!) but I was really happy with the end result! 

Tuesday morning we both woke up early and waited for E to wake up to open presents. It was so lovely sitting in bed as a family doing this together and E loved tearing the paper! 

We popped over to Mum's for coffee and some more present opening and then headed over to our local Harvester for lunch. It was a real shame that what is normally a really nice place to eat was so poor today. You know when you just want things to be special however my two number 1 people seemed to enjoy it! 

We then toddled off to spend Mr F's birthday vouchers on a couple of bits that he wanted before heading home for birthday cake!! 

It wasn't a standard birthday in the Flash Household but we did our best and Mr F enjoyed it which is what matters. 

Are there any birthday traditions in your house? 

A lovely weekend

It is so nice to see the sun. It is amazing how that massive round ball of gas & warmth in the sky can make you feel so much better. 

We also had Chris' Mum and Dad up to visit this weekend. We don't get to see them very often as they live on the South Coast (exactly 211 miles away door to door - a journey C & I used to alternate every other weekend in the early days) and so it is lovely when we get to see them and spend some lovely quality time together (and definitely helped by the sun). 

Friday evening was fairly relaxed as the didn't arrive until just after 4. A couple of drinks in the garden before E went to bed and then some dinner. 

Saturday however was a simply wonderful day. The sun was beating down and it was glorious. We picked them up and had a mooch around Trentham Gardens before heading up 'into the hills' for lunch. 

We visited a little tearooms on The Roaches for lunch and ate al fresco with the most stunning views out over the countryside and Tittesworth. 

The food was pretty damn yummy too

My yummy roast beef sandwich

We headed home for a barbecue after that & E enjoyed some cooling down time in the paddling pool - leaving little trails wherever she went!

Sunday was another cracking day, despite the threat of rain. However, much excitement on E's part had led to not a lot of sleep over the weekend so we needed a real routine day to try and reset her. I went to fetch D&A whilst Chris stayed home and E had a decent 2hr nap. 

After a lovely light lunch we all headed up to the park to enjoy the sunshine and swings. 

"Push faster Grandad Flash"

And then it would have been rude not to head for an ice-cream wouldn't it?! 

It was really sad to take Chris to work this morning and for D&A to be heading home. Next time they visit there will be 2 grandchildren - and probably some more grey hairs on me!! 

A curve in the path

We have had 2 really rough nights with E this weekend. She's been awake for not far off 4 hours a night, dozing for 15 minutes at a time which is not conducive to sleep for Mummy. 

Consequently, your mind starts to work and tick over things that are going on. Last night, my thoughts started wandering back down the path and how much my life, and I have changed in the last 5 years. 

5 years ago I was in an exceptionally unhappy relationship (I can only say that now as I can see how bad it was with hindsight). I was the first one to wade into an argument/debate and wasn't afraid to say what I thought when I thought it. I wasn't afraid to send cold food back in restaurants or complain when I felt hard done by. 

10th April 2010, my life changed forever and in such a good way. I got rid of the bad. I had nearly a year on my own and then, when I wasn't looking at all, I found my soul mate. 

We had a wonderful first year together, married at the end of it, we welcomed our first child and I turned 30. 

And I changed. 

I don't know why. I don't know wether it was because I was a Wife now, wether it was because I was a Mum or because I grew up. 

Now, I'm no longer the first one to join a discussion or argument. I'll sit back and listen quietly, putting my view across if asked or I fancy chipping in. 

I don't send food back unless it is beyond unacceptable. I just eat it and then probably don't return to the establishment.  

I don't see the need to get drunk. I enjoy a drink (when not pregnant) but one or sometimes two is enough. I can't handle the hangover, I don't particularly enjoy the feeling when I've had a few and I just don't see the need. 

I can't be bothered with the petty arguments people have and get into. Get over it. We aren't in the playground anymore. I'm not interested in the he said she said she's picking on me. If you can't say anything nice, just don't say anything at all. 

The most important people in my life are my family and my few close friends. Anyone else I just think if you don't like something I do or say, then lump it. 

I love my life. I love my husband and my daughter (and Brussell) and I love my family. If you don't want to be part of that or you don't want to share what we have then fine. It's your loss. If you don't like something I've said, either tell me in a constructive adult way or don't bother. I cannot be bothered. Again it's your loss. 

Sorry world, this turned into a little bit of a rant and it didn't mean too. I'm just excited about where our path is taking us over the next few months in the future and look forward to sharing it with the few people that really matter.

It has just amazed me how much I've changed in the last 5 years. 

To routine or not to routine...

When I was pregnant with E, I got so many differing opinions about having a routine, when to put it in place, what to do, what not to do that it honestly all got a bit much. 

I always knew that I wanted our baby in a routine, and a routine that suited us, I just didn't have a clue how I was going to do it. So I did what I normally do when unsure, I winged it (with a bit of assistance from my wonderful husband and Mum) and somehow we got a positive outcome. 

E has always had a routine, from the moment she arrived home! 

In those very early days it was as simple as she had her nappy changed before she had a bottle, she slept then she played and repeat. She went to bed when we went to bed and came downstairs when we did in the morning. 

As she grew, the routine grew with her. Subtle changes here and there but something that has always stuck is bedtime. Yes, we may have missed out on some social events, but we needed to have a structured bedtime so that we could have some adult time in the evening. Simply to do things like eat a hot meal, sit quietly and talk about our day, do a few jobs and watch some telly. 

Since E was around about 4 months old, she has always had the same bedtime routine: 

> dinner around 5pm

> upstairs for bath time.

> get dry, have cuddles & jama's on

> story by one of us

> milk by the other one

We have always put her to bed together (and have only missed a handful of nights since she came home) however the last week or so has been getting difficult. She is getting far too excited at story time, constantly looking for the one reading the story, not settling, jumping in her cot - it's been taking not far off an hour or more to settle her. 

So we decided last night that things needed to change. So tonight, we went as follows:

> dinner as per usual

> bath as per usual

> got dried, had cuddles & jama's

> then we said goodnight to Daddy

> I took her into bed, popped her in her cot & she was asleep within 10 minutes having had milk and a special mummy story (good old made up job). 

And so far, so good! She is still sound asleep. There was no tantrum, no tears and no shouting for Yiayia (my Mum - E shouts for her whenever all else fails). 

I'd always recommend a routine for anybody who has a baby. Your baby knows where they are, you know where you are and even on the worst days, you know when there will be some quiet time you so desperately need. 

Yes there will be times you need to say no to things. 

Yes there will be times when your friends think your grumpy cos you're missing out as you've got to get home to put the baby down. 

Yes there will be moments when you would quite happily cave. 

Routine is hard. Getting a decent sleep routine is harder but bloody hell it is worth it and I can safely say, I shall be doing it all over again with Baby Flash v2.0

E's first holiday

Taken me a while to write this post but I wanted to share E's first holiday. 

We had the most wonderful holiday together. We set off on 21st April in convoy (we went with my Mum, Step-Dad and Grandparents) to Talacre in North Wales. E was fab on the journey and slept most of the way which was a result. 

We had a lovely cabin for 8 people (although realistically 6 was pushing it) which was immaculately clean and a really lovely base. The hot tub was lovely too (ssssh, don't tell the midwife!!!)

Monday was spent travelling but on Tuesday we visited Abakhan Material and craft outlet. It is a crafters heaven (good job I'd left the credit card at home). I was so impressed with the staff. They were doing a craft activity for children in the cafe & E was just desperate to join in. The girls were so patient with her and, with a bit of help from Mummy, helped her to make a decopatch dog. The activity was completely free and E really enjoyed it for a good 20 minutes or so! 

Wednesday saw a trip to the seaside at Rhyl. As it is still fairly off season it was rather quite and sadly the weather didn't allow us down into the beach for a sandcastle building session but it was lovely all the same. E spent most of the time taking Grandad for a walk. 

Thursday saw us visit the Welsh Mountain Zoo. It was a good day out for the money however I was surprised at the small size of the enclosures and the behaviours of some of the animals. E loved it. Especially the penguin parade and the chimps. She also surprisingly loved the Turtles and has spent most of the time since we got back saying "turtle". By far her new favourite word! The only problem was, as it says on the tin, it is a mountain zoo and some of the banks were a nightmare with the pushchair! 

Friday was home day. It was sad to come home as we had has such a lovely time. Even down to sitting together in the evenings for a game of scrabble. Something we never have time to do at home. 

The week wasn't without it's trials. E hardly slept at all but somehow kept going, with far more energy than most of the adults! 

We'd definitely go away again & I was so pleased that we had a little family holiday before Brussell joins the party. 

I made E a scrapbook of her holiday, something we always did when we were little and I'd always encourage our children to do. It is a lovely reminder of her holiday with little things to remember it by, tickets to the zoo etc

Here's to the next family holiday! 

Is it really a mothers choice?

It's been a busy week of antenatal appointments here in the Flash household. 

GTT on Tuesday was boring, uneventful and came back clear. 

However yesterday's growth scan was another story. On the positive side, Russel the Brussel is growing well and has all the right bits and pieces where they should be. 

BUT

Is yet again measuring small! 

E was small. She was born on the 6th centile at a healthy and perfectly normal 7lb 3oz. RtB is also it appears going the same way. 

What really bloody annoys me is that because I have a slightly raised BMI, they seem to be expecting me to give birth to the Michelin boy/girl. Just because I don't fit into their computer generated lines then it's all not ok. 

I now have what the consultant has labeled a 'high risk pregnancy' despite having an exceptionally good, natural pregnancy, labour and delivery last time. 

They have also taken away my choice to have a waterbirth as baby is small and I am bigger. And that's what leads me to ask 'Is it really a mother's choice?' 

YES - I understand there needs to be guidelines

YES - I understand the health of my unborn child is paramount

But

WHY can they not see the person behind the piece of paper? 

WHY can they not understand that slightly larger people have feelings and needs too? 

WHY does it all have to be about what boxes you fit in and the associated label. 

So what does the last 10 weeks of my pregnancy hold? 

Weekly visits to the hospital for growth scans and monitoring

Never knowing if this week will be the week our baby is born 

And more worry than is needed when it will probably be the same as E and all ok. 

It would be interesting to hear if anyone else had had similar experiences.