Saturday 5 July 2014

Friends! Or just acquaintances?

Friendship. A word often used but how often is it truly meant? 

By definition (courtesy of our friends at the Oxford English Dictionary), friendship is the emotions or conduct of friends; the state of being friends. 

A friend by definition is A person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations. 
Whereas an acquaintance is a slight knowledge of or friendship with someone

Technically, I've got lots of 'friends'. But when I really think about it, are they actually friends? They are people I say hello to, chat to occasionally, comment on social media posts etc but a true friend?

To me, a true friend is someone that I don't necessarily need to see or talk to for days or weeks at a time yet when we next do, it's like you saw them half an hour ago.
A true friend is someone that doesn't mind if you don't want to talk. They'll happily sit next to you and say nothing at all. 
A true friend is someone that doesn't need reminding about important things that go on in your life, they just remember. 
A true friend is someone that shares the good and the bad. They aren't afraid to admit when things aren't good - and you can bitch, moan, cry and eventually laugh about it. 
A true friend is someone who, when all else fails, will jump in and help you when you need it most. 

I consider myself lucky. I've got 3 really good true friend. However, I've also lost people who I thought were true friends. Some I hadn't known long, some I had known a very long time who I thought were going to be there forever. I was wrong and that's the past. Some people have just drifted away - were they even true friends in the first place? I'd like to think so, well they were to me, but maybe I was wrong? 

However, over the last 2 months, when the shit really hit the fan, I found friends in the most unlikely of places. 
Clare and Vicki turned out to be people I now speak to everyday. We went through pregnancy together (even though we delivered in totally the wrong order) and it was lovely to be able to talk to them about pregnancy and other stuff. I really wish they both lived closer so we could meet for coffee and cake! 

And then I got to Ward 16. When you are stuck in hospital for as long as I was, you honestly dread the people who you might be on a ward with. Will they be normal? will they talk? are they snorers? 
I cannot even put into words how lucky I was with the people I was with. For most of the time, it was just the 4 of us and it really did become a little family. I think the midwives probably hated coming down to our bay!! 
In Leesa, I met one of the kindest, warm people I have ever met. We went through a hell of a lot together and shared things people who have been friends for years will never go through. Our babies will always be birthday buddies and I honestly hope we are friends for a long time. 
Dawn and Kayleigh again are such lovely people. People who cared. We laughed, we cried and we asked for drugs. Both of them on their own bumpy journey to bring their little ray of sunshine into the world. Again, people who I hope to be in touch with for a long time. 

So be honest, how many true friends do you have? 



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